Blind Devotion Read online
Page 11
Gripping his hair, I tugged on his strands every time he drove me closer to the edge, a growl erupting from his perfect mouth each and every time. He teased me. Tormented me, pushed me to the brink only to pull me back time and time again.
“You have to be quiet,” he warned, his mouth and fingers working in perfect unison.
“Then st . . . stop teas . . . teasing me.” I couldn’t believe I’d managed to speak a whole sentence, although it was a bit choppy.
“As you wish.” For some reason, The Princess Bride popped into my head, and I laughed, all while trying to concentrate on claiming my happy ending.
“Something funny?” he asked, moving my panties to the side and clamping his lips over my clit. The slightest flicker of his tongue stopped my brief show of amusement. He teased me before lunging into a full-on attack, sucking and biting my sensitive bundle of nerves, the twinge of pain catapulting my pleasure.
I writhed against his mouth.
I moaned his name.
I came on his lips, my body locking up tight as I rode the wave of pure bliss.
It took me several moments until I crashed back to reality, turning my head from side to side and taking in the scene around me. I was still on my back when Max stood, grabbed my hips and pulled me toward the edge of his desk, papers scattering to the ground at his feet.
I allowed myself to live in the moment, to watch the way his gaze roamed my body before pinning me with a look so intense I swore I had a mini orgasm.
“Hi.” His mouth curved into a smile, his fingers mindlessly tracing my legs. “Are you ready for this?”
“For what?” I received my answer when his hands left my skin and gripped his belt buckle. Then I heard his zipper. Scooting back on the desk as best I could, which was hard to do given my current position, I fiercely shook my head. “No. Stop.” When I’d finally made it into a sitting position, I said, “We can’t have sex.”
“What are you talking about?” He frowned, looking more than confused. “I’ve had my mouth on your pussy. I’ve tasted your cum. That means you’re mine, Alina.” He sounded matter-of-fact, his words tinged with possessiveness.
Pushing him until he moved back, I hopped off his desk, quite the sight with my panties to one side and my skirt still around my waist. Quickly fixing myself, I stepped toward him and wrapped my arms around his neck.
“I need to break it off with Chris before we go any further.” I realized how asinine it sounded, given his head was just buried between my legs moments ago, but it was what I wanted.
“Fine,” he conceded. “But do it tonight.”
Alina
FLICKING THROUGH THE channels, I couldn’t settle on anything to watch, my mind going a hundred miles a minute. How was I going to start the conversation? How would I explain my reasoning? Did I even have to? Did I owe it to him after such a short time together? Would he try and dissuade me otherwise, listing my father as one of the main reasons not to break things off? Or would he divulge deeper feelings toward me and try to convince me to stay with him? So many questions, yet I had no idea what the answers were.
I flung the remote next to me in frustration, and it bounced off the cushion and onto the floor. The back piece that held the batteries in place came off and skidded across the hardwood and underneath the couch.
“Shit!” Dropping to my knees, I peered under the couch and saw it, just outside my reach. I scrambled closer, arching my back and extending my arm, my skirt riding up the backs of my thighs, my positioning contorting. My fingertips grazed the tip of the remote piece. “Come on,” I said out loud, cursing the damn thing and ready to give up.
“I have to say, I kind of like this view,” an amused voice said from behind me. A startled squeal flew from my lips as I wrenched my arm from underneath the couch, turning around only to see a pair of black and white sneakers in front of me.
When I finally got to my feet, I came face-to-face with Chris. “You scared me,” I yelped, clutching my chest, my heart still trying to recover. It was a rarity to see Chris in anything but a suit, but that night he was informally dressed. A plain white T-shirt and dark jeans made him look casual and carefree. His dark blond hair was a tad unruly yet looked as if he’d styled it that way on purpose. He really was a handsome man, too bad he wasn’t the one I wanted. My life would be so much easier if I did.
“Sorry about that.” He smiled. “Your front door was unlocked.” His gaze landed on my chest, his brow quirked up in amusement while the corner of his mouth lifted ever so slightly. He remained silent, glancing up at my eyes then back down to my breasts. Looking down, I saw two of the buttons on my white silk blouse had come undone, exposing the fullness of my breasts. Cinching the material together, I turned around and buttoned it back up, silently cursing myself because I was sure he thought I’d done that on purpose.
I’d asked Chris to stop by so we could talk, but for all he knew, especially after exposing myself to him, I was prepared to take our relationship to the next level. The funny thing was, I wanted to have sex . . . just not with him.
Turning back to face him, I gave him a shy smile, feeling better once I was covered back up. I gestured toward the couch, forgetting all about the piece of the remote.
“We need to talk,” I reminded him, motioning for him to take a seat. Once he did, I sat on the other side of the sofa, making sure there was some space between us.
“Why do I get the feeling this isn’t going to be good?” He leaned forward, only turning his head to look at me, his body tensing for the blow I was sure he was now expecting.
“It’s not. Well, I guess it could be, depending on how you feel about the situation.” My cryptic words only served to puzzle him, the pull of his expression morphing into confusion.
“What are you talking about?”
“Well, I . . . I think that maybe . . . not maybe, but definitely . . . we should . . . we need to stop seeing each other.” I released a breath only to hold an inhale of air the very next moment.
Chris angled his body toward me. “Why?”
Such a simple question, yet I had no idea how to articulate the answer. I couldn’t very well tell him I’d been messing around with Max behind his back. I felt guilty enough about it as it was, and informing Chris of that little tidbit of information wouldn’t serve to do either of us any good. After the thought formed, I knew I was protecting myself more than him, but he didn’t need to know that.
“Because this charade has gone on long enough.” When I saw he wasn’t biting, I continued. “While I like you, Chris, I don’t love you and you don’t love me. I’m sorry you got caught up in my father’s plan for us to marry, but enough is enough.” My fingers twisted the diamond he’d given me before I plucked it from my finger and extended it toward him. He took it but only because I’d practically shoved it at him.
“I don’t understand.” He shook his head, as if he was trying to find the words to convince me to take back what I just said. “I care for you, Alina.” He moved closer and grabbed my hand, his eyes pleading with me to believe him. “Deeply. And I know in time you’ll feel the same about me.”
I shook my head and wrenched my hand free. “I’m sorry, but it’s the way it has to be.” All I wanted was for him to agree, be relieved he wasn’t going to have to get married to a woman he barely knew, give me a parting hug and be on his way. But the exact opposite happened.
“I don’t think you’re thinking rationally, sweetheart.” He moved to snatch my hand back, but I stood and moved back several feet.
“I’m the only one thinking rationally.” A surge of annoyance burst forth, and while I knew it wasn’t Chris’s fault, I blamed him all the same. “We’re not going to marry, and you need to accept it. I don’t care what you or my father thinks. I’m not going to let anyone decide my future for me any longer. It’s not fair.” I was sure I sounded like a brat, but I didn’t care. My thoughts were all jumbled, and I let them escape without thinking to filter any of them. “Why d
id you agree to marry me anyway? Did you think you’d be able to take over the firm once the deal was done? That you would decide what cases we handled? Did you think I’d be easy to control once I became your wife?” I tried to stop myself from blurting the accusatory words but failed miserably, and the hurt look on Chris’s face made me feel terrible.
He rose from the couch and stalked toward me, a mixture of hurt and anger crossing his features. “I can’t believe you think so little of me. I’ve treated you with nothing but respect since the beginning.” He stepped closer, crowding me even though there was still some distance between us. “Have I pressured you in any way? Have I demanded you give yourself to me, complained we haven’t had sex yet, even though we’ve been together for almost two months? Have I not treated you kindly, stepping back whenever you needed time or space?” My lips parted to answer, and to apologize, but he cut me off before a single syllable erupted. “No, I haven’t. So don’t treat me like some kind of leach, grasping on to you in hopes that one day I’ll take over the fucking firm.” He clenched his fists at his sides. “I agreed to marry you so soon after dating because I care for you, as I said before, and I think we’d be perfect together. We have the same demands at work, so we can relate when the other has a bad day. It’s time for me to settle down and start a family and I would love to do that with you.” His expression softened at the mention of a family, while my face contorted in shock.
“Kids? You want kids?”
“Of course.”
It went to show I knew less about Chris than I thought, the subject of children never having come up before. I hadn’t been invested in the relationship to inquire, even after I went along with the engagement.
“Chris . . .” I opened and closed my mouth several times, not sure of what to say. He’d obviously thought about our future more than I had. “We don’t want the same things. I’m too busy with work to even considering having children.”
“You’ll change your mind. I’m sure of it.” He looked so sure of himself, and for a moment, I wished I possessed such confidence, even though I knew it was misplaced.
“I won’t.” Time to end our conversation. “It’s over. I’m sorry if I strung you along. I thought I could go through with it, but I can’t.” I looked away for fear he’d see something in my eyes I wanted to keep hidden.
“Is there someone else?” Dammit! Too late.
“No,” I lied, nervously swallowing as my guilt consumed me.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes,” I lied again, prompting him to approach until he was so close I had to look up to see his face.
“I’m going to go now. I don’t accept we’re over, and I believe if you sleep on it, you’ll agree we belong together.” He kissed my forehead before walking from the room. I heard the front door close seconds later, and was left to wonder what went wrong.
Max
PACING MY BEDROOM in hopes of settling my nerves, which wasn’t working, by the way, I picked up my phone for the hundredth time hoping to at least see a text from Alina. I prayed she hadn’t put off ending things with Harris, needing to bury myself inside her as soon as possible. I was confident I could’ve convinced her to fuck me in my office, right there on the desk, but I saw in her eyes how important it was she not be tied to anyone else before that happened.
Checking the clock on my bedside table, I saw it was just past midnight, the thought she could still be with Harris angering me. And instead of sitting around and driving myself crazy, I swiped the screen and dialed her number. It rang a few times then went to voice mail. I tried several minutes later, and the same thing. In total, I’d tried to reach her five separate times, and each time her voice mail flicked on. I barely stopped myself from driving over there, realizing if I showed up on her doorstep, I could do more harm than good. So against my better judgment, I threw my phone on my dresser and crawled into bed.
I couldn’t get to work quickly enough, beating almost everyone to the office in hopes I’d be able to catch Alina first thing. She typically arrived early, much like me, and that day it would definitely work to my advantage.
Strolling down the corridor toward her office, so as to appear nonchalant even though my heart was pounding in my chest, I rapped on her door before entering. Her light was on, but she wasn’t anywhere to be found. Her purse and briefcase were thrown onto a nearby chair, her cell phone resting on top of her desk. Maybe she was in the break room pouring herself a cup of coffee, and instead of cornering her in there, knowing we’d have no privacy in case anyone walked in, I sat down in her chair, stretching out to get comfortable.
Several minutes passed and still no Alina, although her phone was chiming like crazy. Texts coming through as if someone was telling a damn story and wouldn’t stop typing. Finally, after the sixth alert, I picked up her phone and turned it over. I saw a notification she’d received a text from Harris, but I couldn’t read what it said unless I swiped the screen. I was able to get in without a passcode. Not too smart, although it worked to my advantage. As soon as I scrolled through his messages, however, I wished I’d never picked up the damn thing.
Chris: I’m happy we talked last night.
Chris: I know we’ll be happy together.
Chris: I set up an appointment to talk to the wedding planner. I got the number from your father.
I couldn’t believe my eyes. She’d agreed to go ahead with the marriage? She didn’t break it off like she told me she would? So wrapped up in her betrayal, I hadn’t noticed when she walked into her office, catching me red-handed reading through her text messages.
“What are you doing?” she asked, glancing at me, then to her phone and back again.
“I could ask you the same goddamn question.”
“What are you talking about?”
“What am I talking about?” I parroted. Slamming her phone down, I quickly stood, crossing my arms over my chest and willing myself to stay calm. Well, as calm as I could muster.
“Yes. Why are you so upset?”
“Hmm . . . let’s see,” I said, tapping my foot while scowling. Instead of accusing her of lying even before she opened her mouth, I chose to ask her a question instead. “Did you talk to Harris last night?”
She looked suspicious. “Yes, we talked.”
“Why didn’t you answer any of my calls?”
“By the time he left, I was exhausted, so I took a quick shower and went to bed. I left my phone downstairs.” She crossed the room, walked around me and sat in her chair, looking up at me while I rattled off my questions.
“What time did he leave?”
“Eleven.”
“Why so late?”
“Because he had a lot to say.” She was clearly becoming agitated, but I didn’t care.
“Such as?”
“That’s between him and me.” Alina leaned back and crossed her arms over her chest, her blouse wrinkling up with the movement. Our body language was similar, although I suspected she wasn’t experiencing the same level of hurt, anger, and betrayal I was, giving me the right to continue on with my inquisition.
“Why won’t you tell me? Something to hide?” The pure look of disgust on my face prompted her to change tactics, rising from her seat only to approach me cautiously, as if I was some sort of frightened animal that might bolt at the first sign of danger. When in fact it was she who should feel on edge.
“I at least owe Chris that much,” she mumbled, leaning her hip against the edge of her desk.
“You don’t owe him anything,” I shouted, uncrossing my arms and grabbing hers, pulling her close. “You owe me.”
“What do I owe you?” She tried to move back but couldn’t, my hold on her keeping her still. I swore as soon as we touched, most of what I’d been feeling waned, the need to convince her to be with me so forceful I was consumed by it.
“The chance to see how great we can be together.” When I saw the fire in her eyes ignite, I added what I should’ve to begin with. “You owe it to you
rself to be happy, Alina. With me.” I released her, only to cradle her face in my hands. “Not with him.” I pressed my lips against hers, silently pleading for her to choose me. Breaking the kiss, I whispered, “Why didn’t you tell him it was over?” My mouth hovered over hers, not quite sure how I should proceed if she continued to lie to me.
She pulled back, her hands resting on my chest. “What are you talking about? I did tell him it was over.” Bewilderment wrapped around her until she reached for her phone and swiped the screen. She read through Harris’s texts, and I saw realization flash through her eyes. “Why would he text me these things,” she asked, more to herself than to me. “I don’t understand.”
“So wait. You’re telling me you ended your relationship with Harris. You really broke it off?”
“Yes.” She slapped my chest. “Was your attitude because you thought I hadn’t?” I nodded. “You should’ve just come out and asked me, instead of acting like a complete ass.” The corner of her lips curved, but not enough to complete a smile.
“You’re right,” I agreed. “I went with my first reaction, and that was wrong.” I didn’t have a lot of trust in people, and my lack of confidence in Alina was ill placed.
“You can admit when you’re wrong?” Her grin was finally out in full force, kicking my heart back into a steady rhythm, my sense of betrayal gone only to be replaced with utter longing.
“Yes, but don’t get used to it.”
Alina
WRAPPED IN MAX’S arms, a moment of content silence enveloping the both of us, I was startled when he suddenly spoke.
“I’ll handle Harris,” Max said, pressing his lips to my temple before releasing me, looking down to peer into my eyes. “Consider yourself free of him.”
“I’ll take care of Chris,” I disputed. “Nothing good will come from you confronting him and causing a scene. Besides, my father won’t take kindly to you getting involved.”